I bet everyone hates me a little bit

Here's the part where everyone hates me a little bit - I've always been able to eat whatever I want.  I have always been a picky eater, and grew up on a very processed diet.  My mom is a great cook, but she went back to work when I was 6, so we had mac and cheese night, frozen pizza night, and McDonalds night weekly.  I had a theory when I was 13 that if I ate lots of candy bars and did 300 sit ups a day, I'd get big boobs, but keep a small stomach... and maybe it actually worked.  I've never liked vegetables.  Seriously, only in the last 5 - 7 years have I started eating bell peppers, olives, onions, avocados, spinach, and artichokes.  Heck, I think I only started eating corn 10 years ago, and I don't even thing that's classified as a veggie anymore.  I only eat carrots drowning in ranch, but I have found that I'll eat a carrot and cabbage slaw dressed with something vinegary.

As recently as 3 days ago, I was asked what I've done to loose the baby weight.  Seriously, I'm up at least 7 or 8 pounds since June, but people still ask me how I've lost weight.  I manage to hide it well I think.

So why am I doing this then?  Well, mostly for vanity I suppose.  Partly because I'd like to continue rounding out my diet and eat less processed, more vitamin rich foods.  But the biggest motivator is this photo from my honeymoon.

I worked pretty hard to fit into my wedding dress, and tried to eat "skin foods" for a few month leading up to my wedding - I think that is when I forced myself to try avocado and discovered it was good.  I was somewhere between 125 and 130 pounds in this photo.  I seriously drool looking at the stomach and the arms here.  Those are my biggest problem areas.  I think the angle of this photo also helps me, but that is the body I'd like to get back.

I know my thighs and butt are bigger now too, but that doesn't bother me as much, probably because I don't look at them much.  Also, Phil sort of likes some booty, so I'm ok with those new post baby curves.  The lowest I've gotten since children is 139... but I'm typically between 143 and 145.  I haven't weighed in yet (still have a few days) - but I'm sure I'm pushing 150 right now.

I remember hearing really talented gymnasts complain about their abilities, and being like "man - I wish I could do that skill you are whining about..." - so I realize that to many people, I'm already a skinny person.  And, a skinny person who has a poor diet and barely exercises to boot.  So I understand why you hate me.  This is just some of the insight into my brain and what I'm hung up on.  I'm going to have Phil take some before photos soon.  I'll do a "sucked in" photo, as well as a not so sucked in one, and show you the love handles and arm issues that are driving me crazy.  I'm hopeful that really trying to focus on better food and exercise will make a difference.  Even if my version of better food still makes the health nuts cringe, it's an effort that I'm hoping moves the bar more than I've been able to manage in the past.

I suppose I'm sort of like Scarlett O'Hara - after her kids she couldn't corset her waist to 16 inches anymore, she was stuck at 20 inches.  I just hope in my vanity quest, I don't lose my husband like she did.  I have a feeling I might get a little grouchy.